I have been waiting for a sign – from the Universe, from God, from the Great Spirit – something that tells me that I am on the right path.
Sound familiar?
Every risk I take, I say to myself, “If I get this article published, then I will know that I am on the right path,” or, “If I get this job, then I will know that I am on the right path.”
I have been waiting for validation from God.
It sounds crazy when I write it. I don’t believe that God is up in the sky with a giant checklist watching every decision I make to determine if it goes in the “YES” or “NO” column. I don’t think I am going to get a gold star from God, or anyone, for surviving the past year of my life (Can you imagine it? And this year’s award for surviving trauma and still being able to laugh goes to…Carin L. Reeve!). Seriously, no.
Then this week, I saw this quote and it really woke me up. (Two things that I love probably more than cookies – good quotes and Ted Talks!).
“But my darling, there is no light at the end of the tunnel. You must realize that you are the light.” – Anonymous
Whoa. Wait a minute. So, not only do I not get a gold star from God, it’s up to me to be okay with where I am on my journey? Holy sh*t! No one to blame? No one else is responsible? I am where I am meant to be right now my fear and worry and guilt are only holding me back from where I could be. I am the light.
This is pretty heavy for me because if I am the light, then it is up to me to shine that light on places and spaces that are uncomfortable for me – that might be holding me back: patterns of behavior or beliefs that keep me from connecting with myself or with others. If I am the light, then I won’t know where I am going until I get there. I will have to have faith in God and in myself that I am on the right path and that I will find a place where I fit and will be of benefit (and be able to pay my mortgage).
I am the light. That means you are, too.